The other day when I was discussing the importance of mentoring as part of discipleship with a young Christian man who is the Director of a youth program at a major church and is a youth worker with Youth for Christ / Youth Unlimited (and who I mentor and to whom I have been a role model), this young man stated to me that he found most men in my generation (I am 53 and therefore part of the baby boomer generation) to be more interested in doing things for themselves and pursuing self-serving interests than they are in helping young men become men of integrity -- followers of Christ. He pointed out to me that I was an exception to the rule.
I have found that most Christians are familiar with the Biblical term "discipleship", an awareness brought about by Jesus having had 12 disciples and the great commission to "go and make disciples...". Sadly, in spite of this awareness, I have discovered that many Christians have a poor understanding of what discipleship is all about and that most Christians have never had the experience of being "properly" discipled. What I have found lacking the most in discipleship is the relational component, a bonding which is established between the discipler and disciple. In the Gospel narratives Jesus certainly role modeled this relational component.
During my younger years I benefited greatly from having been mentored, by both Christian and non-Christian mentors. Because of this benefit I have become a mentor, and over the years, I have had the opportunity to mentor several people, "mentees" who have been both Christian and non-Christian. Drawing on these experiences, I define mentoring as follows: "the imparting of oneself to someone else, so that they can become what God desires for them and is calling them to be". When mentoring non-Christians, I replace "what God desires...to be" with "what they want to be". From a Christian perspective the mentoring process should be Christ-centered and biblically-based, and for this reason, I change the "they" and "to become" to reflect the need to have a clear and intentional focus on God's desire and calling for the "mentee".
The "imputing" and "imparting" of Christ's righteousness to us are familiar Reformed theological terms, and for this reason I prefer to use the term "imparting" when defining the mentor's role: essentially it is the giving of oneself so that the other person (the "mentee") can change and grow into the likeness of Christ, to become a follower of Christ, called according to His purpose.
For these reasons and others I consider mentoring to be an important component of discipleship, one that defines the relational aspect of discipleship as was modeled by Jesus with His disciples.
Dr. Fligg D.C., M.T.S., a chiropractor by vocation of 29 years, graduated from Tyndale Seminary with an M.T.S. Upon graduating, Dr. Fligg was the recipient of the scholarship given to the graduate who demonstrated the most aptitude for mentoring and theological reflection. This award/recognition is given by the Centre for Mentorship and Theological Reflection, of which the director is Dr. Dennis Ngien, a well known evangelist and professor at Tyndale.
Jesus says: "You are my friends if you do what I command". When I first read that verse (John 15:14), I wondered how I would respond if anyone said that to me. I wondered what the disciples who first heard it thought. A natural response would be to reply, "Well so much for Your friendship! My opinion is as valid as Yours, and where's the negotiation when we have differences?" The difference is that Jesus is perfect in all His ways. I don't think it was said as a threat, "It's my way or the highway!" so much as it was said as a matter of fact. He had just told them, "Greater love has no one than this: that one lay down his life for his friends". In retrospect, they would see that this was not mere bravado (unlike Peter's first boast) but that He meant it and He "not only talked the talk but He walked the walk" for their sake. The preface was that if we disciples obey His commandments, we will remain in His love. That is not a condition of His love in the sense of saying; "I will love you dependent on your behaviour". Rather it is a way of saying that if we really want to walk in life as friends, we need to be where He is. He cannot deviate from the path of God because God has made Him the Way. It is necessary then, if we want to be with Him as a friend and companion, to do what He did, that is, to do what our Father God commands us.
Sometimes however, it is a challenge to stay on course. That is why it is so important to have a friend or two to share the journey with us so that when (as for the disciples on the road to Emmaus) we just don't recognize Christ in our midst, at least later we can agree that it really was Him speaking to us. When Jesus first sent out the disciples, He sent them out two by two. He knew we needed help and companionship along the way. While we may acknowledge this truth, there seem to be few men who actually have a spiritual friend (sometimes we call them mentors) to walk with us. Even in the church, we often have a few buddies whom we like to be with, but they aren't ones we feel all that comfortable with when it comes to talking about what God is doing in our lives. We don't ask them to discern with us the direction God may be taking us, and there are even fewer we feel comfortable praying with about the sins we struggle with or the deepest hopes and disappointments we feel.
I would like to encourage you to try to find one or two people that you have confidence in as a spiritual friend and make a point of cultivating a deepening friendship with them and Jesus. Hopefully at some point, you can even agree together (covenant) to be accountable to each other in growing into mature Christians.
In Proverbs 27:17, it says, "As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another". I suggest it is time to put an edge on your spiritual life, and God's way of doing this is through spiritual friends. Of course we can still keep our buddies and enjoy our fellowship time with them, but we will have no illusions that our spiritual friends are the principal friends God is using to bring us to maturity in Him.
May God grant you a friend in Him.
Calvin Brown is the Executive Director of the Renewal Fellowship Within The Presbyterian Church in Canada
Muscular Christianity was the ideal image for young men of faith at the turn of the century. Its origins can be traced to the New Testament, which sanctions manly exertion (Mark 11:15) and physical health (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). Muscular Christianity can be defined as a Christian commitment to health and manliness. This is the concept that gave rise to the YMCA (Young Men's Christian Association) where young men were encouraged to train to be well rounded in physical, mental, and spiritual disciplines. the first (physical) and the last (spiritual) being predominant. Sad to say, the "Y" has little of the "C" left in it and is mostly a gym, but in its origin, it was to make men of God in body, mind and spirit. In some ways this ideal was personified in the life of Eric Liddell, Olympic medalist runner and missionary to China. [Editor's note: watch the 1981 movie, Chariots of Fire, for inspiration and encouragement.] Eric was a man of deep faith but athletic endeavour demonstrated that he was no wimp. In fact, faith made him more courageous, bolder, and more manly. I wonder today what image leaps to the mind of young men who consider becoming committed Christians. Is it one of a "couch potato", nerd, or muscular Christian? Which do you think is more attractive? Some churches still encourage the muscular Christian ideal to a degree by sponsoring church athletic teams or summer camps with significant physical challenges. I remember once belonging to a church team registered in a regular bowling league as the "Holy Rollers". Paradoxically when we no longer sponsored the team, some other non-church people took over the name.
Some pastors are active in hockey, baseball or other sports, endeavouring to be a witness and a model without being preachy or overly religious.
It would be wrong, I think, to promote "muscular Christianity" as a superior expression of Christianity, but to those who are able to do so, it is good to keep the "temple" of the body in which the Holy Spirit dwells in good shape. It can provide an opening to share the gospel, and it can remove a stumbling block to others.
As Paul says, our bodies are lent to us, and we will all have to give an account of our stewardship of them. "Do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? And you are not your own. For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's". (1 Corinthians 6:19-20)
Good exercising this summer!
Calvin Brown is the Executive Director of the Renewal Fellowship Within The Presbyterian Church in Canada
Recently the Men's Network Committee approached someone to be speaker at our April Conference and they were unable to accept. Instead they gave us the name of another speaker who they thought would be a wonderful speaker for us. The problem is we only know him by the recommendation we have received from someone we had also known by reputation. We are still praying for guidance on whether to go with the new recommended speaker or not. The process reminds me of several realities in the Christian life. One is what an amazing network there is in Christ's body and what a grand array of gifts to share with one another. The other is the importance of having a good reputation. St. Paul writing to young man, Timothy, reminded him that when he was picking elders or leaders, they needed to be people of good reputation. 1 Timothy 3:7 states, "He must also have a good reputation with outsiders, so that he will not fall into disgrace and into the devil's trap." St. Peter says leaders must be an example to the flock, and Paul, on another occasion, urges Christians to follow his example as he follows Christ's example. What is your reputation in your home, at work, and in your church and community? Is it the kind of reputation that would draw people to Christ or be a stumbling block? I remember on one occasion going door-to-door to invite people in the community to come to church. At one door I visited, the man asked. "Is that the church that my neighbour _________ goes to"? I was pleased he knew his neighbour went to our congregation, and thinking I had a natural connection said, "O yes, he's an elder there." The man replied, "Well if he goes there, then for sure you'll never see me there!"
What's your reputation like?
Does it reflect the fruit of Christ's Spirit in love, joy, peace, patience, gentleness, and self control, or something else?
Prayer: Dear Jesus, help us to be more like You so that our reputations may be a drawing card for people to love You and Your Church. Forgive us when we fail, and enable us to make proper restitution remembering Your promise: Blessed are the peacemakers for they shall be called children of God. Amen.
Calvin Brown is the Executive Director of the Renewal Fellowship Within The Presbyterian Church in Canada
